Friday, September 23, 2005

fashion friday: big strollers

my sister has two kids. one of my friends from grad school has one. i've even babysat two toddlers at the same time, taking them shopping with me at the mall.
and i've never once hit anyone with a stroller.

why? because i know how to negotiate my space in the city.

i used to live in a very baby-populated neighborhood in boystown (oh, boystown before you bacame haven for yuppies!) and i have to admit, the big Hummer strollers clogging Caribou Cafe pissed me off. the looks the parental unit would get as they rammed their buggy over feet, knocking into tables, tumbling coffee cups to the floor, wrestling their way to the front of the line. or the exasperated glares from waitstaff when a huge mercedes benz of a stroller blocks the aisle and there's no way to get to their table. or on the bus, when even the smaller strollers bifurcate the only aisle, trapping other riders behind them.

is this about privilege ('i have a human life in a buggy so step aside') or is it aout being city-dumb?

i think it's about being city-dumb. who in their right mind doesn't fold up a stroller when entering a restaurant, cafe or bus? who plonks their uncollapsed stroller in the middle of the aisle, creating a FIRE HAZARD? who thrusts their large stroller into traffic, stopping right turners who have the right of way, so they can cross the street? who decides that a stroller will fit (head first) into a revolving door?

people who have no concept of living in the limited space of a city.
people who think the world is their backyard.
(and this applies to groups of single women who walk 4-abreast down the sidewalk as they shop - group it together, ladies! this ain't the quad in college!!)
people who would fail a city navigational quiz.

so here's a city tip to those stroller owners out there: fold it up and put it aside.
the world will like you again.

*edited because a cleaner post is a better post*

2 comments:

jp 吉平 said...

It's high school freshman syndrome.

The freshmen clog up the hallway. When you say "excuse me" they freeze. You can wait for the system to reboot or you can smile and grab them by their backpacks and move them out of your way.

Sometimes I have to give an instruction that's more complicated than that, or there's too many to move. At that point, you choose the fewest words. "Get out of my way." Then they will freeze, and to snap them all out of it, you say, "get out of my way by GETTING OUT OF MY WAY."

It offends them but it also frightens them and at least one of them will close their slack jaw and move; then the others have one to follow.

Delia Christina said...

you're funny, jp.

i can totally hear you doing it, too. in your choir voice.