dork love: THOMAS

my new obsession: the THOMAS site.

what is it? it's everything you needed to know about what happens on the floor of the Congress - transcripts, language of bills, histories of votes. it's searchable and i love it.

for instance, if Medicaid is your search term, you can literally trace the conversation our representatives are having about it. you can see how something gets shut out and ends up in committee or gets voted on and passed/defeated. i love it.

the transcripts about SCHIP? fascinating.

want to know what the senate is doing about the recovery package? keyword search 'economic recovery' and look for the amendments with an S.
curious to see what your senator said yesterday from the floor? search the Congressional Record. (i searched 'Roland Burris' and found this.) fascinating!

or am i the only one fascinated by this?

once again, the dork stands alone.

change only goes so far

CQ Politics | Balance of Power - Boehner Celebrates the NO Votes

yeah, GOP, way to go.
congrats on digging in because no one wants to continue the bad ideas that didn't work for the past 8 years for another 4.

enjoy that unity.

noooo!

CQ Politics | Palin Establishes PAC

and, like the undead, she rises.

a memo to media folks: get new friends!!

Obama's ways cool to some, new to others -- chicagotribune.com

a whole story built around breaking down the mannerisms of the POTUS.
gah.

you'd think the 'terrorist fist bump' heard 'round the world would have given them a chance to get all this 'Obama is so...down!' narrative shyte out of their system, but it continues.

here's a tip to mainstream media: you need to get more friends. really.

befuddlement

it's funny how, when you think you finally have life by the tail, things happen to muck it up.

i'm sure this is the feeling Gov. Blagojevich has as he begins his round of PR/reputation recuperation interviews with major outlets this week (look for him on the Today Show, Good Morning America, and Larry King.) i know i said that i wouldn't malign those with genuine mental illnesses by calling him crazy but his behavior befuddles me.

when he's impeached (and there's no doubt that he will be impeached by the end of this week and Pat Quinn will be our new governor by the beginning of February) will he refuse to leave his office? will he force security to eject him from his cushy digs in Springfield? will we be entertained/mortified by a videotape of our impeached governor yelling and screaming while being forcibly ejected from his office? or will he accept his fate and entertain/mortify us with a final press conference which includes a dramatic reading of Whitman's elegy to Lincoln? (O, Captain, my Captain!)
...
spent Friday with LTF. i brought back a souvenir from the Inauguration for him (he's a huge Obama supporter) and as i was taking a cab up to his place i couldn't help but think of how this was something Don, from "Mad Men," would do: come back from a trip and bring his long-neglected mistress a little something to make things better. i might as well accept it; this thing with LTF befuddles me, too.
...
on the work front, my mentor has taken a leadership position with another very large non profit here in the city. on one hand, i'm glad for her. on the other, i'm WTF!!

what does one do when one's mentor moves on? professionally, i recognize that i enjoyed a special kind of privilege because of her willingness to back me up. her departure leaves me vulnerable. when the new CEO comes, her strategic agenda could be very different and the structure of the agency could shift - and not necessarily to my advantage. needless to say, the impending need to navigate tricky office politics leaves me feeling...befuddled.

hmmm...read the tea leaves with me.

this week, the interim will be chosen, it'll take at least 6 months for a new search for a competent CEO to conclude, so i'm estimating that it'll be absolutely crucial for me to have my next leap planned and in place by june - which is also the end of the fiscal year and whatever agency-saving cuts need to happen will probably take place around there, anway.

(and since i'm all overhead, no matter my success with earmarks and appropriations this year or how generally kick ass i am, i'm on thin ice.)

looks like my New Year's resolution to Be Prepared will come in handy.

i'm back from the inauguration

fantastic.

inspiring.

awesome.

overwhelming.

cold.

freezing.

exhausting.

frakked.

perfect.

historic.

a relief.

glorious.

emotional.

hypothermia.

grueling.

torture.

awe inspiring.

once in a lifetime.

hilarious. (road trips with friends are always the best.)



OBAMA!

cops!: some helpful tips

i don't think i'm the only one who gets a little bit more skeeved out when the cops are around.
it could be the loaded gun, the knowledge that they could flip out/have a flashback at any moment, my natural suspicion of state authority, or just my natural aversion to cold eyed dudes in uniform.

but it's helpful to keep one's cool when in the presence of the law. one can't always rely on one's sweet looks or big vocabulary. folks will say that this just makes civilian/cop interaction needlessly adversarial. i say it's forcing them to do their jobs correctly.

they take shortcuts because we (the general public) allow them to take shortcuts.

via the ella baker center for human rights some advice (which i am going to snatch whole):

If the Police Stop You...
Stay in control of your emotions and words. Don’t physically resist.
Keep your hands visible.
Remain silent. They have guns, pepper spray and billy clubs. Your strongest weapon is your mind.
The less you say, the better. Silence is not a crime.
Ask, "Am I free to go?" If they keep you, you are being detained.
Ask, "Why are you detaining me?" To detain you, the police must have concrete reasons to suspect your involvement in a specific crime.
If you’re detained, show ID. If you don’t, they can hold you for three days to ID you.

or Try to Search You...
Never consent to a search.
Say loud and clear (especially if there are any witnesses present): "I do not consent to a search."
Don’t resist physically.
Don’t open your bag for them. It will count as consent to the search.
Police may 'pat down' your clothing if they suspect weapons or drugs.

or Try to Enter Your Home...
Never consent to a search.
Step outside. Lock the door behind you.
Ask to see a warrant. Make sure it has the right information (e.g., address) and a judge’s signature.
They can do only what the warrant allows them to. Warrants often limit the search to one room, one day, etc. Make sure they are complying with the warrant.

or Stop You in Your Car...
Stay calm. Again, you do not have to answer any questions.
When they ask you, show them your driver’s license, registration, and proof of insurance.
Tell the officer, "I do not consent to a search."
Don’t open your trunk or car door. It will count as consent to a search of you and your property.
If they give you a ticket, sign it. Otherwise you can be arrested. Fight the ticket in court later.
If the police suspect you of drunk driving and you refuse to take a blood, urine or breath test, your license can be suspended.

If the Police Arrest You...
Do not answer any questions until a lawyer arrives to represent you.
Say only, "I choose to remain silent and I want to talk to my attorney."
The police may handcuff, search, photograph and fingerprint you.
Do not talk about your case to anyone except your attorney.

If You See or Experience Police Brutality
Remain calm.
Write down the details of the incident, badge numbers, and names of witnesses immediately.
Get a medical report immediately, as well as photographs documenting any injuries or property damaged.

Always Be a Witness
Always be a witness for a friend, relative or stranger.
Stop and watch.
Record the officer’s name, badge number, and car number. Write down the time, the place, who said what, and who did what.
If the officer tells you to leave, say, "I have the right to observe from a safe distance." Assure them, "I’m not trying to interfere."

KEY POINTS
Don’t talk to the police. If arrested, say, "I choose to remain silent and I want to talk to my attorney."
Never consent to a search of your person, vehicle, home or property. If the police search you, state loudly, “I do not consent to a search.”
Document and report police misconduct.

who's oscar grant? we are.

for that matter, we are Dymond Milburn and Michael Cho.

sometimes a person gets tired of saying all the things that need to be said.
it's horrific.
it's sad.
it's enraging.
it's awful.
something should be done about it.

yes, something should.
...

what I wrote to a Facebook friend who was trying to make sense of this shooting in the context of Obama's presidency and the upcoming inaugural celebrations:

Race is part of [this shooting] but the larger picture is the
relationship of the State (as represented by the pseudo-militarized arm of
the law) to the Individual. Although people of color are most likely to
experience violence by armed authorities, there's a particular mindset, or
value system, from the State that authorizes control over the individual, in
the interest of the state, that affects all of us, regardless of color. In
other words, the violence of this episode is just a small part of the other
types of violence enacted against populations the State deems undesirable -
based on class, race,sexuality, gender, nationality or religion. The State
is about asserting authority by maintaining its power; Power is about
control over individuals to cow the populace into submission. And that
shooting is about Power run amok.

you're not short-sighted and these two things don't have to be
diametrically opposed at all. which comes first the chicken (State) or the egg
(Racism)? in my view, they each are signs of the other, both supporting the ends
of the other. racism (and all the other associated -isms that go along with it:
colonialism, imperialism,nationalism, jingoism) has been used like a handy tool
by the State/Nation-State to justify genocide, mass murder, mass displacement,
land theft, asset theft, slavery, etc. but on the micro-level, individual
racists have hidden behind the symbols of the state to commit acts of personal
hatred, in the name of the state. so i'd say it's a matter of both/and, not
either/or.
...

in a conversation with my father before i flew back to chicago after christmas we were talking about a family friend's son, his close call with the sherriff's department in Porter Ranch, and what's at play when police are caught abusing their power. two older men, clearly ex-law enforcement, sat next to us while we ate breakfast. (in LA, you can always tell who's been a cop. white or of color, they all have that no bullshit, soldier face, and give off a sense that they can jump off at any moment. they were not pleased at my conversation.)

my father, an ex-LAPD chaplain, is very much on the side of law & order, but lately there have been too many incidents of young black men he knows barely escaping bullshit arrest and beat downs at the hands of police - escaping because of my father's intervention. he was of the mind that race is the primary motivator.

i said, 'it is and it isn't. it's really about the State controlling the individual. race is a convenient narrative for the victim, the media, even the police department to sell but if we're at all honest about how power works and in whose interest, we're all under the boot. white folks think they're safe because they're not black or brown or they live in good neighborhoods and the cops don't shoot them in the street like dogs. bullshit.

you think the police couldn't - wouldn't - lock down LA now the way they did in '92 during the riots? whose interests are protected by all these acts of police brutality? they're hate crimes, created to cow the populace into submission - and it works! we allow them to videotape us, enter our homes without cause, search our cars, surveil our neighborhoods - and we say ok to all of it because they carry a gun and a baton. sure, it's race, but it's about class, sexuality, politics and mostly about suppressing resistance, suppressing criticism. and we let them do it.'

my dad had a funny look on his face. 'girl, where do your ideas come from?'

i rolled my eyes. 'you!'

next to us, the two ex-cops paid their bill, looked hard at me and left.

read more:
the video of Grant's death
Feministe on his execution
BART security are not merely security guards.
M. Dot at Racialicious on how Gran'ts killing haunts them
the Ella Baker Center for Human Rights, and their PoliceWatch initiative, on what can be done about police brutality
Jack&Jill on an incident of being profiled
Ryan Takemiya on Asian solidarity with the black community in the wake of the Grant murder
RaceWire has a few 'take action' recommendations.
Did you know Mukasey moved to strip immigrants of their rights to due process and access to counsel? (this crap is all connected, people)
Womanist Musings on teaching her sons to distrust the police
Richard, at fem.men.ist, connects various dots (including the Greek riots in response to a police shooting) and puts this event in the larger context of international police action against civilians (including what's happening in Gaza.)

what a way to open the year.

one more reason to love the OED

Added Bonus: Irregardless of what you think, "conversate" is a word - Ta-Nehisi Coates

its editor at large, jessie sheidlower, drops both 'ass' and 'fuck.'

(can you tell i'm procrastinating? i really don't want to rewrite this frakking proposal - so much easier to go directly to the district office, rather than this lobbyist shit.)

must must must read: beyonce and socially conservative ideology

If You Liked It Then You Shoulda Put A Ring On It: Beyonce and Socially Conservative Ideology « the black scientist

i have a new blog crush. (sorry ta-nehisi.)
the black scientist is awesome. you have to read his/her piece on queering the black family, old postfunk people queering love, the post on implicit and explicit racism/media, and this one on beyonce supporting conservative ideology through her lyrics.

(yeah, i like dancing to 'Single Ladies', too, and i think the cop in 'If I were a Boy' is sssmokin' hot, but that video gives me a feminist rash.

if you were a boy, beyonce, you would be Bill Cosby.)

coulter tries to bring it

A fight liberals are dying to have - Ta-Nehisi Coates

this is what i love about ann coulter: she's such a chicken shit coward.

there was this rich girl in 9th grade who was, no holds barred, a stone cold bitch in training. she was mean, cruel and liked to see the 7th graders (like me) miserable. i saw her make a girl break down in tears in the girls locker room after PE; she stood in the middle of her friends and laughed while the other girl snatched up her clothes and ran out the room.

one day during lunch it was my turn. we were sitting at the edge of the quad reserved for 9th graders and she sauntered over with a couple of her friends and drawled out something about how i needed to leave because i was polluting the quad and then called me bus trash (since i was bussed in, along with most of the other kids of color.) my big friend cynthia (who looked like she was 18) stood up, put down her sandwich and asked her to repeat what she said. little rich girl looked nervous and backed off.

and this brings me back to coulter. she brings her vindictive bullying racist shit to folks who indulge that it: white dudes - liberal dudes who are scared of her or conservative dudes who wanna date her. (this is the only way i have of explaining why she keeps going back to them.)

who does she avoid? smart, intellectual, siddity, no-nonsense black women.

let's see her up against someone like bell hooks or angela davis and see how she does then.
(for that matter, let's see her against any of the awesome women of color blogging now, of whom i am familiar with just a few: Angry Black Bitch, Jill from Jack & Jill, La Chola, the women on Racialicious, or Post-Bourgie - all are in my sidebar. feel free to share any of your dream-match ups!)

coates on michelle obama

American Girl - The Atlantic (January/February 2009)

it will be be fascinating to watch how our popular culture relates to michelle obama - and how she reacts to it. (or reacts against it or plays complicitly with it.)

expecting our First Ladies to radically step away from their stubbornly retro image (an image we impose on them, btw) is too much but there is something worth watching as we observe how this First Lady inhabits her new role.

from that first Schakowsky Power lunch in chicago two years or so ago, i've always admired michelle obama. i've liked her style, her smarts, and i've liked how she forced our media to be aware of what an accomplished black woman looked like.

(hear that, Real Housewives of Atlanta? i know some folks may go for that show but they are tacky as hell. frankly, that whole Real Housewives franchise gives me a problematic, feminist rash.)

oh, oprah

i'm watching oprah's show from this morning, the dreaded show wherein she talks about her (gasp) drastic weight gain to a (gasp) whopping 200 pounds. personally, i think the election pushed her over the edge, the way it pushed most of us closer to the brink of insanity.

but i'm noticing her language: 'fat wins' and 'my life is out of balance' and 'i am ashamed of my body.' she described feeling ashamed and apalled during a show with tina turner and cher, wanting to hide when they called her onstage to sing 'proud mary' with them. (ironic, huh?) she called herself 'unhinged,' 'imbalanced,' 'unhappy,' empty.

she seemed really angry at herself, at her body, and i said to Roomie, 'I have never thought these things about myself.' neither has Roomie, who's a big soft girl like me.

sure, i look at my body and go, 'dammit, i'm not 27 anymore!' or, during an afternoon frolic with the LTF, and he's moving my soft body around, i have the stray thought, 'wow, he just moved my post-Agatha kangaroo pouch out of the way to get at me.' i giggled because the moment was absurd.

i'm surprised at the strength of oprah's shame and anger at herself. oh, i get it (society's messages about aging, weight, the objectification of women's bodies, blah blah blah) but at the same time, i don't understand why she's fighting herself so much.

oprah, maybe you're not meant to be 160 pounds! maybe your body wants to be 200 lbs!

a couple of years ago, i wrote down my weight number and encouraged all 5 of my readers to share theirs and one said that she was surprised to find how hard it was to share it publicly. so i'm going to do it again: i weigh 222 lbs. i weigh more than oprah. my whole life i've hovered between 215 and 220 but i don't think i've ever looked at my body and hated it as much as oprah hates hers.

or maybe i'm just a badly trained fat girl who didn't read the memo that i'm supposed to internalize this shit.

andrewfarago: The Lost Marvel Team-Up: Spider-Man and Planned Parenthood!

who says comics can't help you?

guess who got nominated for best large blog?

no, not Screed. (sigh. we're not even big enough to be small.)
the other blog i write for: Bitch Ph.D.

go here and vote for us. (BitchPhD, remember!)
then tell your friends, and your mama, too. and so on.

the Bitches - we must win!

why he's good: coates and poetry

And you always fear, what you don't understand... - Ta-Nehisi Coates

if you aren't reading Ta-Nehisi Coates, you're missing something good.

i like the wide-ranging, walkabout nature of his brain - football, politics, black identity, hip hop, poetry, comics, movies, video games - they're all fodder for him.

this thread, i thought was particularly good. how often do you get (mostly non-english major) folks discussing poetry?

though i'm sad no one mentioned rita dove. (i really like her!)

2009. frak.

happy new year, folks.

this year-end was odd, wasn't it? it felt weird to me.
maybe it was because coming back home from LA took some adjusting; maybe because the news in illinois is so very often bizarre and off putting. for whatever reason, wrapping up this year just felt a little anti-climactic.

like, if the year had ended when we elected Obama, that would have been ok. you know, end on an up note.

in fact, an Obama administration is the only bright spot i can think of, though my optimism is tempered by the realities of 2009: worsening economy, foreign conflict, cleaning up the Shrub's missteps and mistakes.

i think 2009 is going to be a year of reacting to circumstances instead of getting ahead of anything. in my personal life, there are potential blind spots lurking out there. some gray spots, cloudy areas, that aren't clear to me, yet. my professional direction, my new place (once i find one), my relationships - these are all up in the air. this kind of uncertainty makes me uncomfortable.

so maybe a good resolution (to echo past resolutions like Make an Effort) would be Be Prepared.

exciting, isn't it? absolutely thrilling.

like Make an Effort (which was actually effective), Be Prepared works on both a professional and personal level.
Be Prepared to be downsized, if this economy tightens further.
Be Prepared to do some covert interviewing.
Be Prepared to tighten one's belt.
Be Prepared to drop the hammer on LTF. Or not. Who knows?
Be Prepared for some sacrifices.

but also,
Be Prepared to be open for positive changes.
Be Prepared to change my mind about some things.
Be Prepared to shift direction, if a shift presents itself.

wow. i sound positively oprah-like (except i'd have a much better way of fact-checking than she has. clearly, her new mantra needs to be Avoid All Creative Non-Fiction Memoirs!)