this needs to be on a t-shirt (you won't be able to wear the t-shirt but the sentiment needs to be acknowledged):
Hobo: How you doin'? How you doin'? I'm doin' good. Yeah, you know I'm doin' good, cause I'm lookin' good! And you know why I look good? 'Cause I clean mah ass!
--1 train
and with that, i say good night.
12 comments:
Here's an area where women have it all over guys...
I have heard, anectdotally, that there are men out there who, rather than waste any extra soap and water, will wear undies for a few days, turn them inside out and wear the SAME pair for another few days. Seems that some of these individuals are college-educated professionals who can afford both multiple pair of undies AND the soap and water to cleanse them. AND, some of these individuals have girlfriends...
Scary, horrifying—and TRUE!
A-non
it's not about soap and water, Ms. A-non; it's about time and laundry.
Yes it is.
Shhh, yes it is.
By the way, my bottom is CLEAN AS A WHISTLE.
JP, I SO KNEW you were going to comment on this.
And I have to say that as we talked over cake, I couldn't help thinking of the goddamn bippy and your goddamn clean bottom, and frankly, THAT is why you need to just STOP IT already.
I hafta tell ya..A-non is a he.
A-non
A-non? A he? Obviously not an underwear doubler.
I never doubled underwear, but I've been there. The weekend of the midterm, when all you have time for is teach, grade, scan the readings for the class you're taking and show up late to class... there was no time to walk downstairs and put in a load of whites. But rather than double-up, I created some emergency underwear out of some medical scrubs and a pear of scissors. So what?
When I moved back to Seattle and got an income, I had a different strategy; I used money to buy new underwear when I needed it.
That was a couple years ago, and I've settled into a stable, typical underwear/laundry routine.
The bad thing about a stable, typical underwear/laundry routine is that after a couple of years the underwear all start to wear out at once. Then what? It's back to k-marche for five 3-packs of new shorts. Hmph. Who likes to spend $60 on underwear? Not me.
The worst is standing in the underwear aisle, staring at the economy packs, confused by all the choices (boxers? briefs? boxerbriefs? low rise? high rise? acid wash? extra crispy?) and having your field of vision completely filled with packages of dude underwear models, trying to look comfortable and exude their client's corporate philosophy.
How should I pose?
Yah, try to look comfortable, confident, masculine, ambitious, sophisticated, but not self conscious. And try not to upstage the garment.
OK.. a little phyics here, then...
You're saying what's the big deal with wearing undies, turning them inside out, and wearing them some more, right?
Consider that mens' undies are, on average 1/16" thick. After a day's worth of providing a barrier between your se/excretions and the rest of humanity, that fabric is partially soaked.
Now, when you turn that pair of undies inside out, there's even less of a barrier - if any - between your by-products and the rest of the world...perhaps 1/32" assuming stains are stopped halfway thru the fabric.. Heck..they prbly get all the way thru on day 1.
So, you're not only not gaining an extra day's worth of clean undies, you're actually increasing the likelihood that your pants are going to pickup some of the smell, too.
Maybe your life is vastly more hectic than mine is or was during college, but can't remember a time when I could't throw in a load, go study, and set an alarm to throw that load into a dryer.
To me, turning undies inside out for more "use" is no better than a little kid making a mess and shoving it under the rug...
Everyone can see that lump. 'tis true...
A-non
No, that's not what I'm saying. I've never done that before. I said I've never 'doubled up' i.e., turn my underwear inside out so I can wear it a second day.
But thanks for the lecture.
Also, that's not physics. jpv
ps. if you want to know WHY my bottom is as clean as a whistle, just ask the ding.
dudes. way too much info about male secretions and underwear. but, hey, thanks for the education.
lesson: buying underwear for the men in your life is a good idea.
OH..I forgot to add..the point about the incredible CHEAPNESS of male undies..usually, you can find 8-packs for a few dollars.
yes. for mere dollars per week, men can always have a freshly-sheathed doompah.
A-non
apecific brand recommendations?
well, Fruit of the Loom meets the price point I allude to, but I actually prefer Kirkland undies, available at all Costco outlets..
Now, I hate to open a whole new can of worms, but there are those of us out here in Guy land who simply go commando!
heh!
A-non
There is no place within walking distance of the University of Michigan to buy men's underwear.
Options are a) doubling; b) commando, c) emergency underwear.
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