Monday, March 01, 2010

my espresso bean mood...lifting

Reasons for the sudden uplift:

1.  M- and I are still going strong.  We've both admitted to minor, ridiculous jealousies; we don't need to fill the air with chatter; we're still the most boring couple ever; the sex is still...good god; we're both frakking adults about shit (like work stress, scheduling, my HoboMouth, listening to the other person) and I'm getting better at being part of a public couple.  My travel schedule to Springfield isn't as horrendous as some have to endure, but for me, it's annoying as hell; the best part about coming back is emailing him from the train and telling him how I missed him while I was down there. 

He noted, "You always miss me more when you go to Springfield."  (Then he makes a problematic joke about thalidomide, which never fails to make me guffaw, which is equally problematic. I know. I'll repent later.)

And I do miss him more.  I've found that he steadies me when work makes me nuts.  The idea of not having him to quiet my crazy mind almost brings tears to my eyes.  I wouldn't want to deal with what I'm dealing with at work if I didn't have him to come back to.

Uh. Yeah.  Anyway...

2.  I was accepted into the 2010 Spring Leadership and Policy Institute through the NWLCI'm so excited about this opportunity!  I've said to myself that if I was going to be serious about a public office career, then chances like this would be key.  And, they paid for my lodging!  AND - the White House Project bootcamp is coming to Chicago in May!  Maybe I'll go after that, too.

3.  I'm realizing how my satisfaction is so often connected to my core strengths.  As a leadership exercise, we were given this book and my 5 core strengths turned out to be: Ideation, Input, Focus, Achiever, and Connectedness.  Apparently, when things go out of whack or I feel that these needs of mine aren't being met, I go to my Dark Side: my dark, sarcastic, bitter, negative, highly critical side.  It's not pretty.  But I'm becoming aware of it - and how it can really negatively impact a team. So I'm trying really hard to not indulge in my fits of grrrr!  It's not productive.  (Though I still really like the Stockholm Syndrome analogy.  It's apt.)

So there you have it. I'm coming back into the light - and I achieved something I never would have achieved a year ago!  (And, clearly, my revamped resume rocks.)