Thursday, February 09, 2006

the groove is in the details

i'm tired of looking at boring profiles; i'm sure the men are personally fascinating but their profiles bring to mind white noise:

I love movies, music, reading, writing. [well, really. who doesn't? and what kind? 19th century sea ballads? educational films from the 50s? cookbooks? writing notes to coworkers on pieces of yellow tissue paper?] I work out and love to swim and ski. I play guitar and piano and love all kinds of music. ['all kinds.' how discriminating.] And I love to cook. I like the eclectic mix of restaurants [where? what? why?], movies theatres, museums, live music, theatre, etc. [making lists is so tiring, isn't it?] Who would I like to meet? Someone intelligent, kind and cheerful. Someone who's versatile and likes being with all different kinds of people and in all kinds of environments. [and maybe she'll like all kinds of music, too.] A good sense of humour [the british spelling!] is important, as is the ability to handle daily life with grace and goodwill. [this was nice. he should have started here.] I'm looking for someone who's down-to-earth and flexible, who can enjoy spending time together and can feel comfortable with my extremely varied group of friends - from artists to corporate executives. If you're easy-going [who's he looking for? basically, a woman who won't kick up a fuss.] and curious about learning and life, we're probably a good match. Send me a note and let's find out.
this man is a blank. a piece of lined paper covered in erasure scrubs.

8 comments:

Miri said...

Wait a minute, this is a guy i'm emailing off of match....hold on, i guess they're all the same.

Don't you think, though, the opposite is true? That sometimes they try too hard to make a witty/clever/hipster profile that just reeks of poser-ism.

I look for profiles that look "dorky". Those are the best.

jp 吉平 said...

"I can change him!"

Delia Christina said...

i love dorks. if only i ran into them on match. but no. instead, it's just guys who say dumbass things like 'i'm looking for a woman who can wear jeans yet go to the symphony.'

and i keep getting all these guys with kids!! geez. and all these ones from the burbs! agh. ok, it's not as bad as the christian dating sites (don't get me started) but, still. bad!

bitchphd said...

My advice: sign up for a site that has chat rooms. I used "Adult Friend Finder," and yeah, okay, it's about 90% horny guys, but then again that makes the weeding out process quick and easy.

Then hang out in the chat rooms and wait for people who can *write*. The problem with going through profiles is that it's totally random, basically. But in a real time feed, people who can write immediately stand out, and if no one interesting is around, you log off after a few minutes.

I'm telling you, find a man who can write and the rest of it will fall into place pretty well.

Anonymous said...

Submitted to the Radical Woman of Color Carnival: RadicalWoC1

Orange said...

Ha! I like Dr. B's recommendation to find a man who can write. Works for me...

Delia Christina said...

here's what my new profile should say:
'ding wants a guy who can write limericks, essays, and hot emails. all others need not apply. oh, and must be willing to learn mah jongg.'

and i just discovered my dad is on match! gaack! he's going to find me. i just know it. ick.

Orange said...

Are you a stickler for the essay writing requirement? That's kind of a tall order. Maybe "essay writing a strong plus"? The hot emails thing, of course, is nonnegotiable.