inner dialogue

what have you been doing all day, you ask.

well, i say, i've been working.

but isn't this the job you're quitting?

yes, but think of it as the long goodbye. (pause) i think i'm conflicted. i'm thinking that i will be rescued or something.

rescued by whom, you ask.

well, someone who will take me away from all ... all this. (wave of hand) i want a rest for a bit while someone takes care of all the paper and just leaves me alone - except for when i want to have sex. like a mama bear in hibernation who only wakes up for a little hibernatory nookie.

i see, you say.

yes, i say. it's impossible and i think i've stayed away from the gym too long - i tried pulling on a sock this morning and nearly wrenched a disc in my back - so the hibernatory nookie is going to have to be on hold for a while until i get back in uh shape.

and what shape are you in now, you say.

sort of a pearish, softish, soap shape. like lever 2000. but brown. (pause) scratch that. don't think of brown lever 2000.

perhaps an avocado?

yes, i am shaped like an avocado. an avocado wearing boot cut jeans and square-toed stacked heel buff leather loafers.

would you rather wear something else?

i'd really like to wear a sexy librarian outfit, but it's too cold and besides i think my middle is too soft. (pokes middle) see? or, if not the sexy librarian, then the sleek assassin outfit. something that would allow me to go deadly and change the course of history forever. sort of like a kill bill ... but not bill...

yes, you need a rest, you say. your thoughts are becoming dangerous.

mm, yes. a rest. which brings me back to the beginning of our conversation and why i need one.

need what, you ask.

a rest, i say.

why, you say.

because i'm working.